"...I refused to let the tears fall and controlled myself. She would not know how much it hurt my heart, not to mention my mouth. I had a bruised fat lip, as well as a cut below my lip on my chin. I wonder if she was also dissociating in order to cope with what had just happened. For the moment it was buried. 

It wasn’t the physical abuse that was giving me pain. It was the stark realization that I was on my own. It was the realization that for whatever reason my mother couldn’t really love me, and that I would be a fool to expect her to do so. The insight would make me stronger and more realistic. But it also left me incredibly sad..."

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My Story

Rebecca, a Canadian girl who grew up in the beautiful port city of Vancouver, now resides in Richmond, B.C., Canada. In her youth, Rebecca loved individual sport and for a number of years, she competed in rhythmic gymnastics. The commitment and perseverance that was learned through her training, led her to earn a Bachelor's degree of Kinesiology from the University of British Columbia. In 2012 a change in professional direction occurred and Rebecca furthered her education to receive an Infant Development Certificate, also from the University of British Columbia. For the past seven years, she has worked as an Infant Development Consultant, supporting parents and their infants, as a home-based visitor. Rebecca is trained in attachment-parenting and co-facilitates educational parent groups, and works alongside families to help support them in their child's development. The instability and unpredictability of her own childhood home ultimately led to a complete ignorance of who she was well into adulthood. In sharing her story, Rebecca hopes to inspire others to work through their trauma and subsequently free themselves. When she is not writing, she enjoys publicly sharing her story, drinking coffee, spending quiet time with her partner and children, and Rebecca dreams of waking up to the sound of gentle ocean waves (with a cup of coffee).

“A brilliant and enthralling book that captures the trauma and the elements that can prevent young people – especially women – really acknowledge who they are.”

- Dr. Howard Rankin

My Book

In this insightful memoir, Rebecca traces her roots to discover why she lacked self-identity and self-confidence. What went wrong along the way? Ultimately, multiple adverse childhood experiences intersected at a time in her life when she was most developmentally vulnerable. Her story shows you how she overcame these setbacks to finally, find herself. Have you been in harm’s way and physically or emotionally hurt as a child? Now, as an adult, do you sacrifice yourself to limit your vulnerability, or are you truly who you were meant to be?

How does your life compare to Rebecca's?
  • Single parent upbringing
  • A dominating & insecure mother
  • Excessive people-pleasing
  • Lack of personal boundaries
  • Physical abuse
  • Sexual abuse
  • Divorce
  • Orientation confusion